A personal first for me

[MorganGrayson]

I had an electrician out this morning to look at my breaker box. The guy was fantastic: funny, bright, verbal...everything I could want in somebody spending three hours at my house. During the course of the many rapid fire conversations...I actually *told* him what I did for a living. Not just "I'm a writer" or "I build websites," I told him *what* I wrote and what kind of websites I build. (Why? I could ask myself. No clue. I guess ya just had to be there.) Well, he'd planned on sending me an email of all his recommendations, so he has my email address. He also has a piece of paper on which I wrote the URL to one of my websites. I handed it to him, chuckled, and said "in case you'd like a little 'quiet time' later." It broke him up.

It felt magnificent to be completely me. I told him that I was "Morgan Grayson" in case he ran into the name, and he said "*you're* 'Morgan Grayson'?" in a way that made me wonder if he'd read the name somewhere. (He's probably in his 30's or 40's - I'm not good at guessing ages - and definitely has all of his testosterone flowing in all the right places.)

I smoked, I swore, I told him how to improve his website - a rapid fire lecture that made him hand me his phone numbers and ask if he could stay in touch, because I knew things he didn't even know he didn't know, if you follow that. (In case you're reading this Nick, you'd be proud to know my mercenary brain cells were firing and thought I just might be able to turn this into some money as well as pleasant conversation. :) )

It was the first and so far only time I've told someone who walked into my "real life" what I do so completely. It was wonderfully liberating. For a few hours, I was all of me. I liked it. I'm not stupid enough to haphazardly announce to the world what it is I do, but I just might lighten up a little with some people.

Can any of you relate to the wonderful feeling it is to say "this is who I am and what I do"?

[Bhelliom]

Congratulations.

It's always fun to tell people what you do. Although for me I do it more for the shock factor. I love the expression on people's face when they realise exactly what I do.

I love it more when they get excited about it ;)

Mostly I'm still not at a point to tell random people exactly what my company involves itself in however.

[Deuce]

Originally posted by Bhelliom
Congratulations.

It's always fun to tell people what you do. Although for me I do it more for the shock factor. I love the expression on people's face when they realise exactly what I do.

I love it more when they get excited about it ;)

Mostly I'm still not at a point to tell random people exactly what my company involves itself in however.

I used to be quite about what I do, but Shock value is the best. I recently told Mom what I do for a living, the shock was priceless. Now I don't care who knows.

[gnat69]

Morgan, you make me laff.......:D

This is a good thing, since you should be yourself always...

I don't hide what I do, since I am actually proud of it, but I do like the shock factor also....

But then again if we didn't do this for a living who would.....

MG you have just wanted me to get to know you more :p

and

Bhelliom since we are so close we should do guinness and shock everyone....LOL :bonk:

[Bhelliom]

Gnat I'd love to.

In fact we're closer than close... from what I understand your offices are like 2 blocks from ours. I'm on the other side of the Rotisserie coffee shop :P

[MorganGrayson]

Thank you, gnat! :D

I've always been proud of what I do, too, and have gotten the opportunity to explain it at length (why I'm proud, I mean) to a few people. Oddly, they were also the people I was doing it *for.* When I did phone sex, I considered myself the ultimate in "safe sex." Nobody was going to catch some deadly disease from me; they weren't going to get rolled in an alley; it was THEIR damned cock and they could play with it if they wanted. The married guys were not "having sex with another woman." I told more than a few that I may not know all there is to know about sex but the one thing I was positive about was that you had to be in the same room to do it. (I also got a lot of mileage out of "I don't know how big your dick is but I doubt it's 3000 miles long.")

I also helped a lot of guys understand why they had the fantasies they did. (To the absolute bewilderment of my boss, who occasionally used to say "just fuck them, Morgan, don't analyze them!!" :) ) That was always part of my "service," though. Once they came, the meter was off and they could chat for a few minutes for free. (I worked for a very classy and good outfit.) That's usually when the "mental health" part of the project came in.

Guys who read my stories and get off - or women, or couples - aren't going to get ill, hurt, or lie to anybody just to get some relief. They're just doing what comes very naturally. I may not get credit for the score, but I do get credit for the assist.

We live in a society that despises sex yet uses it to sell every damned thing from toothpaste to cars to beer.

I don't understand it at all.

[Nickatilynx]

Excellent Morgan....

It should always be about the money! :)

I never shirk to tell people i own several hundred adult sites.

Though ,I've never classed myself as a pornographer. I'm an" internet marketer."

I posted in 96/97 on Ynot that I will send traffic to the highest bidder. I'll send to donkeycumguzzlingbitches...or Taylor Made Golf.Whoever pays me the most.I'm a traffic whore. If someone needs converting traffic I can garner it.And when they NEED it they pay more. :)

Adult has not been worth my while to send to in years.

But I certainly never hide my adult roots. ;-))

So I'm hardly in adult anymore not through fear of being a pariah or anything else...merely there isn't enough money.

Hell , as a ROKSO spammer I am in many elements of the internet considered a pariah anyway. ;-)))

Its fun being the bad guy , isn't it ;-))

[Nickatilynx]

Oh , For the record, i have not "spammed" in years either.

I'm a bulk mailer thesedays specialising in ultra targeted mailings :)

[Vid Vicious]

Since october last year ... I figured what the hell .. I don't hide it anymore .. according to my parents everybody in my family knows .. and no one really cares .... But that's Family and close friends ...

Meeting a regular girl for the first time is the toughest ... I've learned not to refer to my Industry as porn to these people .. I like to Call it Adult Erotica ...

However good for you .. there is no shame in what we do. I say this to all my models too. Be proud that you're able to do something you enjoy and make decent money with.

[MorganGrayson]

Thank you, Nick. I knew you'd be proud of my rather automatic mercenary feelings. :) (I liked it, it felt good...I've never really been able to do the "yes, fine and all, but what's in this for ME?" before, but apparently, something kicked in.) :)

I went to his website, then sent him an email explaining what was wrong and how his site designer was no doubt going to have absolute kittens when I was done giving advice. (For fuck's sake, the site not only has FLASH it has SOUND. Ouch.) I told him his keywords were all wrong and he'd get tagged by the search engines for spamming. I can't wait for the "how did you know *that*?" moment. Ah, the wonders of "view source" and the number of people who don't know about it....

He needs a writer badly. Luckily...I know one.... :D

[Virgule3]

Everyone in my family knows. They have always known I think. I never tried to hide it from them but then again, my dad is super open minded. We grew up with Playboys laying around and I remember sitting with ma father, asking all kinds of questions about what the people in the pictures were doing and what things were and my father was never embarrassed or too prude to answer. He always told me things the way they are.

My now ex-boyfriend always had a problem with it though. I was honest with him from the beginning, and he's okay I guess but he doesn't want people to know.

As far as my co-workers (I have a regular day job), most know my best friend is a porn-chick (http://www.angeliquexxx.com) and many of my clients know as well because I have become friends with most of them. They don't know I shoot porn, but they know I do a lot of photography including nudes.

My dad always says: "As long as it's not your ass out there... you can do whatever you want in this business!" But if I ever decide to tell him I have modeled back when I was 50lbs lighter and 7 years younger, he wouldn't care, I'm sure!

Sophie.

[Wicked Temptress]

That's awesome Morgan! I'm glad that you were able to have such a pleasant experience! ;)

[MorganGrayson]

My electrician called me three times yesterday. Boy, give a guy a few hours of pleasant conversation and he's yours for life! (There's a moral there, I like to think.) :)

He wanted to make sure that the service I got from everybody else involved in the saga of my air conditioner was up to par. According to his standards...they weren't. He'd already drilled into me "this is a continuation of my service call, so you should NOT have to pay another copay to the insurance company!" (I so would not have known that.) He also had me call the insurance company back and sound as sick as possible and request that they speed the fan motor along as the heat was causing my pain to go through the roof. (I did and nearly scared myself. I sounded like I had one foot over the threshold to Death's Door. It's true though. Fibro + heat = BAD.) *sigh* I'll get a new fan motor next week...should I live so long.

Thanks for your support, guys. :) I made a mental list of all the people in my life that know me only partially. Sadly, my siblings are at the top of the list. When I found my own spiritual path and the intense joys and comforts thereof, I never told them. I didn't want to have the "YOU converted to Judaism and is there anyone else in your bloodline who yelled "Mazel Tov!" louder or who always sends cards on all the right holidays and who never sends 'Christmas' gifts but ALWAYS sends Hanukkah gifts?!?!?!?" with my sister after she popped a vein that I'd converted to Wicca. (In fairness, I didn't tell another dear friend that I'd converted for a long time, either, for fear she wouldn't understand. I was grossly unfair to her. When her boyfriend's Mom was dying, I got a panicked e-mail that said "please do whatever it is you do in such circumstances." She not only supported...she believed.) So, maybe I'm being unfair to my sister. However, I did tell her a long time ago what sort of sites I built expecting her support on the money angle if nothing else...and didn't get it. I've noticed that my sis is a tad judgemental and opinionated over the years.

I like being me. I don't do things of which I'm ashamed so I shouldn't have to hide them.

[Nickatilynx]

I like being me. I don't do things of which I'm ashamed so I shouldn't have to hide them.

Very Nice... :)

[gnat69]

Gnat I'd love to.

In fact we're closer than close... from what I understand your offices are like 2 blocks from ours. I'm on the other side of the Rotisserie coffee shop :P


hehe, just hit you up :laughout:

[gnat69]

Thank you, gnat! :D

I've always been proud of what I do, too, and have gotten the opportunity to explain it at length (why I'm proud, I mean) to a few people. Oddly, they were also the people I was doing it *for.* When I did phone sex, I considered myself the ultimate in "safe sex." Nobody was going to catch some deadly disease from me; they weren't going to get rolled in an alley; it was THEIR damned cock and they could play with it if they wanted. The married guys were not "having sex with another woman." I told more than a few that I may not know all there is to know about sex but the one thing I was positive about was that you had to be in the same room to do it. (I also got a lot of mileage out of "I don't know how big your dick is but I doubt it's 3000 miles long.")

I also helped a lot of guys understand why they had the fantasies they did. (To the absolute bewilderment of my boss, who occasionally used to say "just fuck them, Morgan, don't analyze them!!" :) ) That was always part of my "service," though. Once they came, the meter was off and they could chat for a few minutes for free. (I worked for a very classy and good outfit.) That's usually when the "mental health" part of the project came in.

Guys who read my stories and get off - or women, or couples - aren't going to get ill, hurt, or lie to anybody just to get some relief. They're just doing what comes very naturally. I may not get credit for the score, but I do get credit for the assist.

We live in a society that despises sex yet uses it to sell every damned thing from toothpaste to cars to beer.

I don't understand it at all.

You said it perfectly :)

[Shane]

That is awesome Morgan.
I had a 2 hour lag before I was able to work today due to a plumber visit. The guy was really young and very quiet so I decided to can the work for the duration of his visit. Normally it wouldn't have been an issue but he was working on the bathroom in my office.
I like to be open about what I do with family and friends, but since I live in the middle of the bible belt I do tend to keep my mouth shut around those I don't really know.
I would love to be a bit more "free" about what I do...

Kudos to you Morgan!!

Morgan, did I read that right and you are wiccan? ;)

[jacobkell]

Why should anyone shame?I mean for me this is job as any other.A little different but job.

[MorganGrayson]

Shane...yes, you read that right. I converted years ago. I focus on Wicca mostly as a religion and don't particularly practice the Craft, with the exception of "positive energy" spells. I was raised Roman Catholic and was totally miserable. I discovered Wicca and felt as if I'd come home, which I believe is the feeling that everyone should get from their Path. :)

[DonMike]

Congratulations.

It's always fun to tell people what you do. Although for me I do it more for the shock factor. I love the expression on people's face when they realise exactly what I do.

I love it more when they get excited about it ;)

Mostly I'm still not at a point to tell random people exactly what my company involves itself in however.


Same here. People ask what I do and I proudly proclaim "Porn" with a big smile on my face. Then I explain the boring details. LOL!

[DonMike]

BTW, Morgan, I just love reading your posts. They always brighten my day. :)

[MorganGrayson]

BTW, Morgan, I just love reading your posts. They always brighten my day. :)

Why, thank you and right back atcha, you sweetie! :luv:

It's long been a philosophy of mine and my husband's that if you can't brighten the world around you when you got out...stay the hell home. :)

We like to make people laugh, especially each other. To our total amazement, we get asked if we're newlyweds a lot. We were once asked that question at the grocery store by the clerk. The question caused my husband to put an arm around my shoulders and ask - in a voice that carried for aisles - "we've been together this long, had two children...don't you think it's about time we got married?" I didn't know who to kill first. The oh-so-funny husband on my right or the hysterically laughing teenager daughter on my left. :)

[LindaMight]

If I ran a porn site where I wasn't the "porn star", I would not care who knew that I was a porn webmaster. But...since the site is just me......with all of the totally evil and whacked people out there......no one needs to know who I am....ever. It threw me for a loop one day when a garage door repairman started hitting on me and saying "you look familiar....are you on the internet?". I said..."what's the internet?". :)