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View Full Version : The Dysfunctional Section of a Hallmark Store


Don Soporno
03-12-2004, 12:08 AM
1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now
that you've come into my life...
(Inside card) - I've changed my mind.

2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life...
(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you.

3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for me.

4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go....
(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably
need it again.

5. Someday I hope to marry...
(Inside card) - Someone other than you.

6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!

7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me...
(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

8. We've been friends for a very long time...
(Inside card) - What do you say we stop?

9. I'm so miserable without you...
(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.

10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy....
(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was?

11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there
was only one life jacket...
(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.

12. Your friends and I wanted to do something really special for your
birthday...
(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.

13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Alabama, Mississippi, and West Virginia.)

14. Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but
wonder...
(Inside card) - What was I thinking?

15. Congratulations on your wedding day!...
(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband.

Panky
03-12-2004, 08:44 AM
<img src="http://smilies.sofrayt.com/%5E/c0/biglaugh.gif" width="15" height="15">





<img src="http://smilies.sofrayt.com/%5E/r/biggrininvert.gif" width="15" height="15">

Bratt
03-12-2004, 11:37 AM
When i was younger, I remember a store in our mall that carried cards like that... I used to buy them all the time, just so that I had them in case i needed them rofl.

Had one that was something like ... "I am sorry for being such a jackass... .(inside.. a coupon for 1 swift kick in the ass')

another .. I am usually a very nice person...(inside..but in this case I will make an excretion)...

Just two of my favorites.

Don Soporno
03-12-2004, 05:20 PM
I wish I could find cards like that