Bratt
04-05-2004, 01:42 PM
How to Build a Web Page in 25 Steps
Download a piece of Web authoring software ~ 20 minutes.
Think about what you want to write on your Web page ~ 6 weeks.
Download the same piece of Web authoring software, because they have released 3 new versions since the first time you downloaded it ~ 20 minutes.
Decide to just steal some images and awards to put on your site ~ 1 minute.
Visit sites to find images and awards, find 5 of them that you like ~ 4 days.
Run setup of your Web authoring software. After it fails, download it again ~ 25 minutes.
Run setup again, boot the software, click all toolbar buttons to see what they do ~ 15 minutes.
View the source of others' pages, steal some, change a few words here and there ~ 4 hours.
Preview your Web page using the Web Authoring software ~ 1 minute.
Try to horizontally line up two related images ~ 6 hours.
Remove one of the images ~ 10 seconds.
Set the text's font color to the same color as your background, wonder why all your text is gone ~ 4 hours.
Download a counter from your ISP ~ 4 minutes.
Try to figure out why your counter reads "You are visitor number 16.3 E10" ~ 3 hours.
Put 4 blank lines between two lines of text ~ 8 hours.
Fine-tune the text, then prepare to load your Web page on your ISP ~ 40 minutes.
Accidentally delete your complete web page ~ 1 second.
Recreate your web page ~ 2 days.
Try to figure out how to load your Web page onto your ISP's server ~ 3 weeks.
Call a patient friend to find out about FTP ~ 30 minutes.
Download FTP software ~ 10 minutes.
Call your friend again ~ 15 minutes.
Upload your web page to your ISP's server ~ 10 minutes.
Connect to your site on the web ~ 1 minute.
Repeat any and all of the previous steps ~ eternity.
Download a piece of Web authoring software ~ 20 minutes.
Think about what you want to write on your Web page ~ 6 weeks.
Download the same piece of Web authoring software, because they have released 3 new versions since the first time you downloaded it ~ 20 minutes.
Decide to just steal some images and awards to put on your site ~ 1 minute.
Visit sites to find images and awards, find 5 of them that you like ~ 4 days.
Run setup of your Web authoring software. After it fails, download it again ~ 25 minutes.
Run setup again, boot the software, click all toolbar buttons to see what they do ~ 15 minutes.
View the source of others' pages, steal some, change a few words here and there ~ 4 hours.
Preview your Web page using the Web Authoring software ~ 1 minute.
Try to horizontally line up two related images ~ 6 hours.
Remove one of the images ~ 10 seconds.
Set the text's font color to the same color as your background, wonder why all your text is gone ~ 4 hours.
Download a counter from your ISP ~ 4 minutes.
Try to figure out why your counter reads "You are visitor number 16.3 E10" ~ 3 hours.
Put 4 blank lines between two lines of text ~ 8 hours.
Fine-tune the text, then prepare to load your Web page on your ISP ~ 40 minutes.
Accidentally delete your complete web page ~ 1 second.
Recreate your web page ~ 2 days.
Try to figure out how to load your Web page onto your ISP's server ~ 3 weeks.
Call a patient friend to find out about FTP ~ 30 minutes.
Download FTP software ~ 10 minutes.
Call your friend again ~ 15 minutes.
Upload your web page to your ISP's server ~ 10 minutes.
Connect to your site on the web ~ 1 minute.
Repeat any and all of the previous steps ~ eternity.