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Funbrunette 02-01-2003 11:31 AM

A lesson for the women!
 
For those of you who are married, were married, or are contemplating marriage under the assumption that men need (or ought) to be trained for marriage...


TWO YEAR DEGREE


A new two-year degree is being offered at the University that many of you should be interested in: Becoming a Real Man.
That's right, in just six mini-mesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as earn a MA degree

(Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

FIRST YEAR

Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101: Combating Stupidity
MEN 102: You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103: PMS-Learn when to keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104: We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule:
MEN 110: Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111: Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at 4am
MEN 112: Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100: Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101: Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A: What's Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:
MEN 120: How NOT to Act Like a Butt face When You're Wrong
MEN 121: Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122: YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123: Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C: What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR

Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101: You CAN Fall Asleep without It
SEX 102: Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103: How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201: How to Put the Toilet Seat Down

(Elective - See Electives Below)

Winter Schedule:
MEN 210: The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211: How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212: You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213: Honest, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise
MEN 230A: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important

Spring Schedule:
MEN 220: Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221: Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary
MEN 222: Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223: Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2


Course Electives:
EAT 101: Cooking with Tofu
EAT 102: Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 103: Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231: Mothers-in-law
MEN 232: Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233: Just Say "Yes, Dear"
ECON 001C: Cheaper to Keep Her


Just a thought for all the women out there.

MENtal illness
MENstrual cramps
MENtal breakdown
MENopause
GUYnocologist (poetic spelling)


Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?
:bonk:

Raya 02-01-2003 04:33 PM

Grin!:bonk:
I could probably take some of those classes too.:p

DragonKing 02-01-2003 04:41 PM

I'm wondering if Evil Chris is taking this course as we speak!!??

<img src="http://smilies.sofrayt.com/%5E/7/whip.gif" width="50" height="37">

firehorse 02-01-2003 04:56 PM

I am so lucky my wife loves me. Then again I absolutely adore her too!:D

Darin 02-01-2003 05:00 PM

Oh geezus!

Poor Chris. How many years of schooling do you have Chris? MUAHA!

Evil Chris 02-01-2003 05:22 PM

I'm a qualified INSTRUCTOR!

Funbrunette 02-02-2003 01:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DragonKing
I'm wondering if Evil Chris is taking this course as we speak!!??

<img src="http://smilies.sofrayt.com/%5E/7/whip.gif" width="50" height="37">

He's actually giving the course! :D

Feynman 02-02-2003 01:57 PM

You forgot

ECON-PREP01 : everything that used to be yours is now hers.

HOUSE-103 : Misc Housekeeping.
sysnopsys: dirty clothes storage and handling techniques; principles, technology and practical approach to the problem of the empty toilet paper roll; envirnomentally sound nose booger disposal; temper control: how to resist playing Michael Jordan with your snotty kleenexes

INL-101: Introduction to proper behaviour in the presence of in-laws.


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